PARAMUS, New Jersey -- When Mark Malkoff thought about where he could stay while his New York City apartment was being fumigated for cockroaches, he quickly ruled out friends' places (too small) and hotels (too expensive).
Instead, the comedian and filmmaker decided to move into an Ikea store in suburban New Jersey, where on Monday he unloaded two suitcases into a spacious bedroom at the store.
At night when the store is closed, he says he'll play laser tag with security guards and even plans to host a housewarming party.
"The fact that Ikea is letting me do this is mind-boggling," said Malkoff, lounging on a bed in his new room. "There's no way I'm going back. I love this way too much.
Deputy store manager Julie Mott said Malkoff contacted the store about three weeks ago and presented a proposal to move in.
But despite the hospitality, Malkoff did find a few problems: The sinks don't work, and neither does the toilet, refrigerator, flat-screen television or the washer and dryer.
He must shower in the staff locker room and will have access to the staff cafeteria to cook his own meals, if he chooses, Mott said.
His wife of 2 1/2 years, Christine, isn't as thrilled with his new digs and has instead opted to stay with relatives in upstate New York. "For some reason," he said, "she doesn't want to live in a store."